Thanksgiving came and went. Fortunately it really did happen just like that, because The One was away in Vermont snowboarding, and after breaking his collar bone, I wanted the holiday over, him home, and I just wanted to know, were we pregnant? The weeks before I had some symptoms, the sore boobs, the complete exhaustion, the moodiness (ok, it DOES count as a symptom, it’s not my fault I am predisposed to THIS one!!!) and I really did find myself crying at every little thing. Yet, being on this journey for a few months, I knew full well that all of this could very well be PMS.
One thing about this month that had me, fertility friend had placed a “triphasic” message on my pregnancy monitor. What that means simply is there was a third thermal shift, which could indicate pregnancy. Add to that my temperatures were staying way up there and I was beginning to really think we had something going on here. My life began to revolve around one moment in the day, the time I wake up to temp, and every day I would say, ok brace yourself because today its going to go down. And sure enough, beep beep beep beep, I look and its still elevated.
The One arrived home from Vermont, and we spent Monday catching up. Earlier in my blog, I had mentioned the difference between lovemaking for the purpose of making a baby, and lovemaking for no reason other than being completely intimate with the person you love most in this world. We already knew our window was closed for the baby making. So, use your imagination as to what our Monday was like!!! The reason I am sharing that, I am already late for AF at this point. But Tuesday night I went to the bathroom, and there was this clear mucus with a faint tint of pink to it. Immediately I told The One I got my period. I was completely crushed. On the second wipe there was nothing. Sitting there, crying because I was SURE that we finally had it, I just did not want to get up or accept that this was it. I felt a wetness again, and on another wipe there was a little more of the same, and that was it.
After all of the trying waiting hoping, how can it be over so quickly, just like that? I wait days for my period to end, at least a week to ovulate, two weeks to see if I am pregnant and in one second, it can all be taken away. As I flushed the toilet Tuesday night, I remember thinking see ya HOPE. But I did know that no matter what, we were not done, because we have not yet made Myrtle.